Tick, tick ... tock

The clock is ticking away, time is passing and what am I doing with it?  I feel its wasted and lost.

Wasted Time ... let's investigate this theory that is squishing me into the corner.

Time = the duration of human existence.
Wasted = done to no avail; useless.

This is what I feel like, wasted existence.  To exist is one's lifetime.  There are only so many years in a lifetime, days in a year, hours in a day, minutes in an hour and seconds in a minute.  Why waste even a single second?

I've finally gotten back into reading on a regular basis, that makes me happy.  Now I am also writing as well (and you're reading some of it here :O).

What else makes me happy?? Knitting, spinning, playing with fiber.  I spend all day working to make money to make these hobbies a reality, but that's just it, they are there - reality is the quality or state of being real.  They are real, they are there, they do exist, but do I do them?  Not consistently.

Do - to perform, to execute, to accomplish, finish or complete ... ahh herein lies the answer.  So do I accomplish, finish or complete ... nope, not this year.  This lifetime, yup, I've done some.  But this year ... not many.  There is a void - empty, useless, ineffectual ... yup that's what I'm feeling.

So how does one rectify this predicament?

Schedule - a plan of procedure, usually written, for a proposed objective, especially with reference to the sequence of and time allotted for each item or operations necessary to its completion.

Oh I've done this before, allotted time to perform certain acts, but did I perform or do them - nope ... why?

Because I get distracted - now this is a fun word!  Distracted - rendered incapable of behaving, reacting, etc. in a normal manner, as by worry, remorse, or the like, irrational; disturbed.  So now I'm crazy.  Well yeah, I'll admit I am a little, but in the fun way.

 Fun - something that provides mirth or amusement.  Well who the heck wants to be normal??

Normal - conforming to the standard or common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.

I don't want to be normal.  But I do want to spend my time in a fun way.  So let's look at abnormal, fun, spending and time.

Abnormal - not normal, average, typical or usual (so far, so good).

Fun - enjoyment or playfulness (sounds good to me).

Spend - to pass (time) in a particular manner, place, etc. (I've got the place, now let's find the manners).  I'll do you one more - manner - a way or doing, being done, or happening; a mode of action, occurrence, etc.

Time - duration as regarded to belonging to the present (yup I'm with you so far).

So, in recap, what I am NOT doing is spending my time in a particular manner.  This is what needs to be rectified.  Clearly I need a schedule, I've got the time and I've got the manners (things to do).  So it leads us back to the initial question, why am I not doing?  Because I am distracted ... by what?

Well work takes up 12 hours per day (getting out of bed and ready 2, travelling to 1, working 8 hours, travelling from 1 = 12).  I don't think a definition of sleep is necessary, we all know what that is and why its important.  So 8 hours there.  That leaves 4 hours per weekday and 16 per weekend that I have free ... to some extent, yes the cat box needs cleaning and dishes, laundry and floors need to be done.  So let's say 3 hours per weekday and 14 per weekend.

Where is this time going??

Stay tuned, I can't figure it out all today ... because I need to go to bed to get the sleep (hopefully 8 hours) to get up for work (2 hours) and drive there (1 hour) and work (8 hours) and get back home (1 hour) .. maybe in my 3 extra hours I'll figure it out tomorrow :o)

I hope you had fun reading this little exercise in exploring a theme and word play for me ... but seriously I need to figure out where my time goes!